27.1.10
Bored in camp
How long is this going to last man.. such a dull job which is making me even duller as a person. ahh
18.12.09
181209 Reflections after my bday;)
It was a birthday of ups and downs..I really received more presents and congradulations this year and maybe its cos i really started to socialise more. The best present i like was the shoes given by kewei and kevan. Although they look mud and im oso considered 'mud', i still love them alot. Thanks for everything guys:) My 19th birthday was also the only one when my indian campmate sang a tamil version of happy birthday to me.LOL it was hilarious but i really appreciate it.During my birthday though, i tried all i could to eat as little as possible cos i do not wan to turn fat overnight.hahaha, so guys u see me eating a few slices of cake only. Im a Easytofat person, so i will then to watch my diet more.hahaha so guys u have to eat my portion for me:)
Yeah..but on my birthday itself, i was really sad cos i felt betrayed by an old friend.One who not only did not wish me during my bday but also did something ridiculuously hurtful to me.It dampens all my birthday joy that i got..Sometimes i do not understand why she had to do this cos I am a normal guy too. I have emotions I have my pride.Even when I'm ready to put it down sometimes.U cant expect me to do it all this while.. So.. yeah.. I will just leave you alone for an indefinite time and let you know that Im not unaffected but just that Im just not going to put myself as a voodoo doll and let you prick my heart anytime u want.U told me frens forever, but how come i feel so humiliated.haiz.
Despite all this i managed to find out who were my real friends in the process and i do get alot of support from my besties;) I will step up and just do whatever is right for me at the moment.Cos im not really in a veri good state of mind now.Going to sleep guys.. Good Nite!
Yeah..but on my birthday itself, i was really sad cos i felt betrayed by an old friend.One who not only did not wish me during my bday but also did something ridiculuously hurtful to me.It dampens all my birthday joy that i got..Sometimes i do not understand why she had to do this cos I am a normal guy too. I have emotions I have my pride.Even when I'm ready to put it down sometimes.U cant expect me to do it all this while.. So.. yeah.. I will just leave you alone for an indefinite time and let you know that Im not unaffected but just that Im just not going to put myself as a voodoo doll and let you prick my heart anytime u want.U told me frens forever, but how come i feel so humiliated.haiz.
Despite all this i managed to find out who were my real friends in the process and i do get alot of support from my besties;) I will step up and just do whatever is right for me at the moment.Cos im not really in a veri good state of mind now.Going to sleep guys.. Good Nite!
25.8.09
A new place,a new heart,a new beginning..
Well,there are several stuff on my mind now..while it makes me feel very bothered and rather stressful,but also they are certain things which have made me feel like how good my life i can be if i change more of my 'not so perfect traits'.haha..
Just yesterday i just passed out from the MP basic course after 9 weeks of tedious training..I certainly made a lot of friends there..Jus to name a few..Manraj Torance Ahmad and the jovial Bruneian friends! I admit i wasnt so used to the bunk in the first 2 weeks as i guessed i haven realli adapted to their culture..However,when i really tried to communicate with them i came up with one conclusion..It's not easy making 2 drums hit at the same beat,but since one is definitely faster den the other,we just have to learn to compromise any perceived flaws that they have just like the way they treat us.:) No one is perfect and we should never blame anyone if they cannot do just because we expect them to.
Leaving my friends will be painful for me cos i was only just beginning to mix so well with them..if the course was all about reaching its main objectives, then the main benefit whilst picking up knowledge was the time we spent togther playing soccer,watching hangover(with my section-absolutely awesome) and also doing several stupid stuff togther..Now i want to leave a few words for my good buddies in my section mates..
Torance especially is a real bugger and is full crap for half the day,but when u get to talk to him normally,u realised how strong he is in his own beliefs..
And Chris I'm sorry i always call u selfish and stuff but i just wan to change ur attitude towards things that happen around u.see u became a better person after the course,budden u are stiu ****** up.LOL
Manraj u r a great soccer player and i hope u will pass ur ippt soon..Always keep the story i told u about during guard duty..It is supposed to be classified;)
Ahmad u r finally a rider!! I told u many times that i believed that you will be a rider cos i think a rider has to be passionate and not bcos of other reasons.and u certainly have the credentials to be one.i will miss poking u during ur slp tho.haha!
And Bradley!! Dun keep reading books hor..haha!
I hope my time in uni will come sooner after my stay in my new camp..who i noe alot of my frens are dying inside,espc the monsterous one.haha! Talk next time.Sleeping time!
Just yesterday i just passed out from the MP basic course after 9 weeks of tedious training..I certainly made a lot of friends there..Jus to name a few..Manraj Torance Ahmad and the jovial Bruneian friends! I admit i wasnt so used to the bunk in the first 2 weeks as i guessed i haven realli adapted to their culture..However,when i really tried to communicate with them i came up with one conclusion..It's not easy making 2 drums hit at the same beat,but since one is definitely faster den the other,we just have to learn to compromise any perceived flaws that they have just like the way they treat us.:) No one is perfect and we should never blame anyone if they cannot do just because we expect them to.
Leaving my friends will be painful for me cos i was only just beginning to mix so well with them..if the course was all about reaching its main objectives, then the main benefit whilst picking up knowledge was the time we spent togther playing soccer,watching hangover(with my section-absolutely awesome) and also doing several stupid stuff togther..Now i want to leave a few words for my good buddies in my section mates..
Torance especially is a real bugger and is full crap for half the day,but when u get to talk to him normally,u realised how strong he is in his own beliefs..
And Chris I'm sorry i always call u selfish and stuff but i just wan to change ur attitude towards things that happen around u.see u became a better person after the course,budden u are stiu ****** up.LOL
Manraj u r a great soccer player and i hope u will pass ur ippt soon..Always keep the story i told u about during guard duty..It is supposed to be classified;)
Ahmad u r finally a rider!! I told u many times that i believed that you will be a rider cos i think a rider has to be passionate and not bcos of other reasons.and u certainly have the credentials to be one.i will miss poking u during ur slp tho.haha!
And Bradley!! Dun keep reading books hor..haha!
I hope my time in uni will come sooner after my stay in my new camp..who i noe alot of my frens are dying inside,espc the monsterous one.haha! Talk next time.Sleeping time!
9.8.09
a short quizz
Copied from becca,
From now on,you cant tell lies,are u ready?
Depends on who.
Think about six months ago,u were single..?
Yeah.
What do you carry with you all the time?
My wallet,hp,itouch? And my sexy body:)
When you say you dont care do u mean it?
Dun think so bah..i dun like hurting frens.
How are you feeling?
Recovering from a bout of painful emoism.
Is something wrong right now?
Yeah.But no point thinking about it:)
Are you mad at someone?
Kinda, im mad at myself too.
What is on your mind?
Empty.
Are you jealous of someone?
Actually not one only.LOL
Do you have a piggy bank shaped like a pig?
I had.but full le.deposited during sec 3.saved around 1k ok!
Do you want to start over with someone?
i guess so.
Do you know if someone likes u?
Well everyone does.LOL
Are u good at hiding my feelings?
LOL alan shud noe the answer.
What are you supposed to be doing now?
Sleeping.
True love or 1billion bucks?
LOVE:))
Has any one tells u u haf pretty eyes?
Nice nia..:(
Anything u would change about ur life?
Make myself a better fren?
Could you cry now?
Im gd at that:)
Do you think about stuff and cry?
yeah,but onli if it touches my sensitive point.
How often do you hold back from saying what you are thinking?
Sometimes when i should think for the other parties.
Last person i told a secret to.
LOL 4got.haha
Do you like hugs?
Definitely
Do you believe true love can conquer everything?
yeah most of them but not EVERY thing.
When was the last time u cried?
2 weeks ago.:(
How much money did u spend today?
40?
What are you sitting on now?
my bed
From now on,you cant tell lies,are u ready?
Depends on who.
Think about six months ago,u were single..?
Yeah.
What do you carry with you all the time?
My wallet,hp,itouch? And my sexy body:)
When you say you dont care do u mean it?
Dun think so bah..i dun like hurting frens.
How are you feeling?
Recovering from a bout of painful emoism.
Is something wrong right now?
Yeah.But no point thinking about it:)
Are you mad at someone?
Kinda, im mad at myself too.
What is on your mind?
Empty.
Are you jealous of someone?
Actually not one only.LOL
Do you have a piggy bank shaped like a pig?
I had.but full le.deposited during sec 3.saved around 1k ok!
Do you want to start over with someone?
i guess so.
Do you know if someone likes u?
Well everyone does.LOL
Are u good at hiding my feelings?
LOL alan shud noe the answer.
What are you supposed to be doing now?
Sleeping.
True love or 1billion bucks?
LOVE:))
Has any one tells u u haf pretty eyes?
Nice nia..:(
Anything u would change about ur life?
Make myself a better fren?
Could you cry now?
Im gd at that:)
Do you think about stuff and cry?
yeah,but onli if it touches my sensitive point.
How often do you hold back from saying what you are thinking?
Sometimes when i should think for the other parties.
Last person i told a secret to.
LOL 4got.haha
Do you like hugs?
Definitely
Do you believe true love can conquer everything?
yeah most of them but not EVERY thing.
When was the last time u cried?
2 weeks ago.:(
How much money did u spend today?
40?
What are you sitting on now?
my bed
31.7.09
Friends..
The past 2 weeks have been a real struggle as I had to fight with my conflicting mindset and my heartaches..basically, i actually let history repeats itself yet again.I felt that i really lost one of my best friend's trust yet again..
Well, the 1st time was after Os and I had a great friend in A(cannot reveal name).. We were more or less considered childhood friends, since we known each other since primary 2.We were always having fun every weekend playing soccer and stuff.And we were considered best gaming buddies as we usually help one another when we needed help.However, at that time i realised certain flaws in our friendship..He was a temperamental guy and he tends to ask me to help him all the time when he needs help in the game..like playing for him(sorry was really a nerd last time)I always gave in without complains as i dint want to lose a friend.But little did i know that the frustation was just accumulating inside me like the yellowstone ultra-volcano in the US waiting to explode..The day after Os was it..I decided to just tell him i wasnt helping him anymore cos i decided to leave my nerdy ways when i get into JClife.He was furious after that and we totally never communicated til like 2 years later?But even at that time,we told each other that we were both sorry for what happened Haha..but it wasnt the same anymore.there was this tremendous awkwardness and i think we just wanted to carry on in our lifes..
Now i cannot believe I actually let the same situation to strike me again -.-.But i guess this time it was more of my fault this time cos I was too sensitive all the time..i had been friends with her for 2 years plus now and to be true,i could trust her for anything cos we have few common frens.And i know that you trust me alot too..However, she had her own restrictions and I always fail to keep to my promise all the time i guess.(cannot reveal too much haha) I took her forgivings for granted and clearly this time i have pushed my limits too far.Moreover,I'm a very emotions based person and i am very rash in doing things.I'm really sorry for that.I need to stress on one point on my blog tho.I have always treat you as my friend and whatever u do to me, i just wish for you to be happy.:)
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
And it feels like you don't care anymore
Well, the 1st time was after Os and I had a great friend in A(cannot reveal name).. We were more or less considered childhood friends, since we known each other since primary 2.We were always having fun every weekend playing soccer and stuff.And we were considered best gaming buddies as we usually help one another when we needed help.However, at that time i realised certain flaws in our friendship..He was a temperamental guy and he tends to ask me to help him all the time when he needs help in the game..like playing for him(sorry was really a nerd last time)I always gave in without complains as i dint want to lose a friend.But little did i know that the frustation was just accumulating inside me like the yellowstone ultra-volcano in the US waiting to explode..The day after Os was it..I decided to just tell him i wasnt helping him anymore cos i decided to leave my nerdy ways when i get into JClife.He was furious after that and we totally never communicated til like 2 years later?But even at that time,we told each other that we were both sorry for what happened Haha..but it wasnt the same anymore.there was this tremendous awkwardness and i think we just wanted to carry on in our lifes..
Now i cannot believe I actually let the same situation to strike me again -.-.But i guess this time it was more of my fault this time cos I was too sensitive all the time..i had been friends with her for 2 years plus now and to be true,i could trust her for anything cos we have few common frens.And i know that you trust me alot too..However, she had her own restrictions and I always fail to keep to my promise all the time i guess.(cannot reveal too much haha) I took her forgivings for granted and clearly this time i have pushed my limits too far.Moreover,I'm a very emotions based person and i am very rash in doing things.I'm really sorry for that.I need to stress on one point on my blog tho.I have always treat you as my friend and whatever u do to me, i just wish for you to be happy.:)
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
And it feels like you don't care anymore
23.7.09
Harry Potter and Obsessed.
hellooo.. Haha.i went to watch harry potter and the half blood prince on sat with my class buddies:) the movie is better den expected actually..budden the ending stiu sux.but its classic harry potter isn't it? In the movie,we could all c how much all the kids have grown up.harry isnt so shuai as b4 le!maybe thats cos that freddie guy who like emma watson outshone him..anw emma watson is cute and hot when shes all grown up.haha..heard she has a bf nw,a 25 yr old businessman.lol!oso,i duno y but i found ginny kinda cute.tho alot pp will disagree wif me.hahahaha..on the whole,i have to say i love the way dey introduce more humour into the show,especially the part when the ron was super smitten by a love potion and the part ron and harry tok about what dey look in the girls dey like.haha skin-.- i haven read the book tho and i tink i shud cos i heard the book is much better:) On sunday,i watched obsessed with a friend b4 booking in..haha sum1 said its a thriller,but apparently its nt.. nvr let me stand up de.haha.but at least the extent of the obsession was quite amusing and it had an interesting plot.If any1 was like lisa,i dun tink most guys cn withstand her suggestive acts..Love is an obsession anw.haha.gd nite!
15.7.09
The magic of love
Too much time in Mp le!So just took abit of my time to write abt everyone's common topic. LOVE:) The gd things that come along with having love in your life,sometimes acts as a double edged sword,as it could easily bring one's spirits down as easy as bringing it up to make u feel on the top of the world..But for me,i felt that the pain of loving makes love more precious. From past experiences,nt only from me..but also my closer frens who told me of their r/s matters,i came to realise that pple show a stark contrast to who dey are when they are so called love struck.I know this cos I'm one of them.U will start seeing pple with determined minds and seemingly unbreakable minds being unlocked upon interacting with those they found the special bonds with.On the other hand,u could c pple becoming from being the shyest boy in town to one who is amazingly being able to stand on his own and display a never-witnessed before charisma.This is not 'wayang' but rather a fair move in the complexed love arena..
Well,Love is a complicating matter where all the rationals they you had previously have are being thrown away..I was in a similar postion before..where I was really hurt to the point i couldnt recognise who i was anymore.Everyday was like a torture to go by.Luckiy,i always managed to pull through such moments.haha.If love was suppose to be a bliss all the time,it wouldnt be love anyway..
Too late le! I love you!
Well,Love is a complicating matter where all the rationals they you had previously have are being thrown away..I was in a similar postion before..where I was really hurt to the point i couldnt recognise who i was anymore.Everyday was like a torture to go by.Luckiy,i always managed to pull through such moments.haha.If love was suppose to be a bliss all the time,it wouldnt be love anyway..
Too late le! I love you!
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